Lately I feel like an addict. It's a sucky feeling.
I find myself dancing on the cliff's edge, where there is neither serenity nor escape. I'm looking for something I can't have. Linsey was right: you can't have an ass-kicking experience every single day of your life that's better than the day before. For example, you only get one virgin viewing of Fight Club. Every time after that you're just re-watching it.
My addict is moving in, rearranging my furniture and hanging posters on my walls. He has the tactical advantage of knowing my weaknesses. He can match my debating skills and my powers of persuasion. His will is as great as mine. He has at his disposal my finely tuned ability to nonchalantly lie, and my tendency to passive-aggressively avoid healthy habits. He's got my charm and wit. Like the addicts we meet in real life, he's not a one-dimensional storybook bad guy, but a complex and confused human being, who will fight and deceive and cajole to get his needs met. He is all these things because he is me.
Read the rest of this post at The Second Road...
7 comments:
Get thee to a meeting.
But for the record your bad guy sounds like my alter ego...
I think it's kinda fun to watch the addict move in a decorate. It's just a bitch when you finally get around to kicking him out - breaking up is hard to do
I hope you will go to a meeting and get rid of the b**tard.
Eli. I think it is important to realise, as you have done, wht the disease is up to. It always tries to destroy by stealth as it knows a frontal assult will very quickly be repelled. At times like these, meetings and higher power are my prtection. I hope you make it through ok.
This post makes quite an impression. I hope you do whatever it takes to not let the addict take over. My best wishes are with you.
KICK HIM OUT!! He doesn't belong there anymore. There is no room for him there. Call your sponsor please...and keep putting one foot in front of the other.
There how's that for not giving advice! lol
Cat- Aren't most of our bad guys kind of the same?
Mantra- Of course it's fun- that's the problem. When I'm honest I can admit that I miss that guy sometimes.
Mary- He is indeed a bastard!
Findon- Exactly-always sneaky, stealthy, slowly.
VR-Thanks - I'll try...
Annette- Advice is fine. And that's right- my life is too crowded, too good, for both of us, right?
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